epiphany

ok, it's my last week of 100% raw. first, i would like to be honest and say that i have had 3 hard boiled eggs this month. i also had a cup of popcorn and a few pretzels the other night. and i've had a combined total of about 5 glasses of wine. oh, and in total, 6 lindt truffles. ok, feels good to get that off my chest. i also feel entitled to bites of things that do not include meat. i mean it when i say bites. and my boyfriend means it when he offers me the absolute smallest portion possible with the tip of his fork. funny. not.

i've been thinking about how much i have been craving steak. i think about it a lot. i think the problem with this diet is that my body is a protein whore. hence the hard boiled eggs. that being said, the other night my friends got steak to make at home. the smell of it made me ill. the look of it made me ill. i ate a teeny bite of emily's steak. it just wasn't that impressive. weird.

the reason i entitled this entry epiphany is that i had one today. what i'm going to say would have nauseated me a month ago, so reader beware...

i am satisfied with much much much smaller portion sizes. i have found that throughout the month i have been eating less and less. not like scary less. but like an orange satisfies my hunger craving and i don't eat again for an hour or so less. i don't want to get too excited and think that my issues with food are over. part of this could be that i am completely and totally sick of the food. which is an interesting point. i have found that in the last week or so i haven't really wanted the food from the restaurant, i would rather make my own salad with lots of fun and interesting vegetables. kale is so good for this. i went to whole foods the other day and they had the best kale salad that was heavy on the sesame oil dressing that was DELICIOUS. but seriously, i've always been a sucker for the salad bar. the difference is now, bring on the full fat God blessed olive oil. and i don't feel guilty even a little.

a sad thing to report is that i am growing sick of avocados. maybe sick is too strong. but my heart used to palpitate thinking about guacamole. now, i just feel happy and content. ok, so that's not exactly "sick of" type feelings. and yes, i did make a huge vat of guac last night for the game watching party. and yes, i ate my fair share. but still, not as exciting.

on the other hand--oranges! who knew? my school apparently gets their oranges from the grove of glory. since the students never eat their oranges in our breakfast cooler, i take the leftovers and eat them myself. mmmmmmmmmm.... smaller oranges have a higher probability to be particularly juicy, tart, sticky, and tangy. I am so happy about oranges.

another thing to note is that in this whole month i have only had one tray of raspberries and i have had no other berries. weird. but it's winter. they're not in season. barbara kingsolver would be proud. (but only of that, none of the rest of my food is local.)

finally, the question of "how now, brown cow"? i've been thinking about what to do next. i have decided, based on the fact that my online budget-ometer tells me i spent $600 on groceries and dining out this month (i am a cow) that i am not going to continue the program. also, i'm getting a little sick of the food. but i am planning to continue in an endeavor to eat a high raw diet. what one man defines this to mean is that you eat 70-90% raw, 10-20% vegan and 5-10% whatever you want. (which he defined to mean, "even animal protein.") i think i can mostly do this. i am going to continue to do no sugar and caffeine, and press onward. i think that this really is good for my body and for my mind and spirit.

i'm starting the training for the triathlon next month, so i think eating high raw, with more hard boiled egg and other lean, organic, locally grown, happy protein added in will be a good combination for the training. i do think i will mostly stay away from breads and grains. i once had a doctor tell me he thinks i'm allergic. also, a lot of crackers and the like are more processed than i would like. i am trying to stay away from ingredients i can recognize or pronounce. if i don't have a good idea of how it is taken from the ground and put into my food, i probably shouldn't be eating it.

alas, i have only lost a little over 5lbs so far. but i feel like that weight loss has been legit, and earned. it's not just a fast fad thing, but a changing and renewing of my mind and body. and that's worth far more than 5lbs. (and maybe even $600?)

COLD!

You know when you're having a blah day? Your head kind of hurts, you feel achy. You're grouchy and grumpy and just don't feel like doing anything? Yeah, I haven't had any of those days since eating raw. For someone with chronic headaches and a lot of grumpy, this is a pretty big deal. It shouldn't shock me that my diet affects my mood, but I didn't realize just how much my diet affects my mood and general outlook on life. It's not like every day is peachy. But I feel calmer. Which is nice when a student in my class stands up for the 457th time to declare some defaming statement about me or a peer. I can respond with only a light tap instead of my usual ass kicking. No, but seriously, I think my students are happier, too. And even when things don't go my way, I actually have these moments when I think, "I'm just going to enjoy this right now." Yeah, I know, other people have probably reached this level of enlightenment years ago. Bravo to you. I'm more likely to use cuss words in my head, all the while smiling, when the person in front of me in the grocery store insists on using exact change... and is paying with pennies.

On other notes, I seem to recall that two weeks ago I said that I would be trying to do yoga everyday.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

OK, change comes slowly and so far I have made it through half a yoga session. Only half because my friends came over. Yeah. I guess that makes yoga an area that still needs improvement.

I'm starting to think of what the next month will hold, once all my food is gone. The woman who runs the store told me that she would let me apply what I've already paid toward a long subscription, so I could get the next boxes for cheaper. But I don't knot if I want to eat raw for three more months? But I also feel better than I ever have before. And I wonder how I am suppose to go off of raw? All good things to think about. I do think that one of the major reasons I feel so good is not eating refined sugar. Interestingly enough I haven't craved it nearly so much as I thought. (An embarrassing part of the movie of my life is watching me eat sugar on a binge. Yeah. Remember Gollum looking for "his precious" in the Lord of the Rings? The similarities are a little too close for comfort.)

A'ight. My prep is over. 4.5lbs down.

Reflecting on the 1st week

It's been a week, and I didn't want to bore anyone with the daily antics of "I ate a cucumber today" and "Wow, my poop is green." OK, maybe that second one isn't so boring. But it is true.

Things I have decided:
1. Part of what makes raw so healthy is the amount of energy you use simply chewing. There is a LOT of chewing involved in raw.
2. I'm surprised at how clear headed I feel. I haven't had any headaches this week. I have felt strong and really clean. The only thing I've noticed is feeling tired, but that can also be attributed to this week being very busy.
3. I still haven't had any major cravings, except bread. I really want some bread. Mmmm. Crispy, warm, french bread...with butter. Hey, I'm not perfect.
4. I have been impressed at my resolve. I have turned down some fabulous food opportunities. Eating out at the Italian restaurant I ordered spinach salad. At my trainings, I didn't eat the Potbelly's sandwiches.
5. I cannot get over the way an apple tastes. Juicy, crunchy, tangy, sweet. I eat the apple until the only thing left is the seed and the stem. Wow.

I also poop green and I've lost 3lbs so far. So that's not bad.

No pictures today, but I'll post one soon.

Day 2

The first day went well. I abstained from food at a Christmas party that I went to in favor of my hummus salad waiting for me at home. Shocked at my resolve. I was also surprised by how I haven't really been hungry. I nibble on the meals here and there, but I haven't finished a whole meal yet. Not only does this mean I have old meals to munch on, but I think that the food is more satisfying.

I do have to say that there is a lot of chewing involved in raw eating. Broccoli is the best, since it gets soft in the various sauces and dressings, and soaks up the flavors. It's a sponge of flavor.

The best part of the raw food thing is avocados. I don't think I could eat enough avocados. I made a huge bowl full of guacamole, heavy on the fresh lime juice. Delicious. I followed it up with a dessert of a grapefruit, which was it's own delight.

I am feeling a little congested, which they said could happen in the first week or so as your body rids itself of toxins and preservatives. Other than that I feel pretty clear headed, and I have way more energy than I thought I would. I was a little tired yesterday which could definitely have to do with kicking the caffeine habit.

The biggest craving I've had so far? Lasagna. Mmmmm... Also, the green soup they gave me for my breakfasts is not going to happen. Ew. (The picture is the hummus salad)

Happy New Year!

This is one of three million blogs that is going to be started today. Don't think that I feel that my decision to detox in January is creative or new. But I am excited about starting down a path toward healthier eating and living. Besides the fact that I gained three pounds and five percent body fat over Christmas, I have decided that it is time to be more intentional about what I allow my body to have to process.

Since I am a teacher in a very high need school, I find myself both overwhelmed and uninspired when it comes to cooking for myself at the end of the day. I want to eat healthy foods, but the local taqueria, drinks out with friends, a frozen dinner, or other quick fixes seem so much easier. Therefore I was pretty excited when I heard about a raw food restaurant in Chicago that makes affordable meals for busy people like me. I admit, I kind of feel like a cheater, but I am going to use this time to learn as much as possible about eating and cooking raw.

I'm hoping that this blog will inspire with pictures, references to other raw blogs, recipes, and honesty. While I am doing this I am also going to do yoga every day with my home videos. Finally, I am currently reading Animal, Vegetable, Mineral by Barbara Kingsolver to learn more about the food system in the United States.

To end, I would like to say that guacamole is my favorite part about being raw. (And the picture is of seaweed pasta with vegetables)